Comics for 3/12

In Maryland, no one can hear you scream. Or something. Being in Maryland means I can't just walk over to a comic store, so my grandfather has to drive me. Anyway, got comics today, a lot later than I had wanted, but whatever.

Kick-Ass 1


Basic Plot: In a universe more like ours (in that there are no superheroes), one kid wants to be a superhero.

Okay, this is just freakin' crazy. Have I ever imagined being a superhero? Heck yeah! Emphasis on super, though. People really can be like the Punisher, as he has no powers, and mostly just causes people to be afraid of him and then kills them with guns. Sure, he does it better than probably most people, if not anyone actually alive, could do, but it is possible. I want to be Spider-Man or Deadpool or Wolverine or someone like that. Unfortunately, that cannot happen in our universe, so I am content with reading about them. This kid isn't. I don't really know what the point of Kick-Ass is. Maybe it is to show people not to be costumed vigilantes because without powers, you can't really do it. Or is it to show that people can be costumed vigilantes and do well? Or is it to show that actual people would get the crap kicked out of them for trying stuff like superheroes, and that if you try hard enough, you can do well, but you have to be prepared to be stabbed, beaten up and run over by a car. Oh, and don't try to fly. It doesn't work. All in all, though, I had fun reading the issue. A lot of references to actual people's discussions of comics and stuff (Galactus as a cloud? Astonishing X-Men kicking ass) made it feel cool and like a comic that I want to read more of. Although not for younger readers, it is pretty darn cool. Missed it before, but now I have it.

Amazing Spider-Man 553


Basic Plot: Freak evolves more and Spidey gets yelled at by his new boss.

I don't really like the art in this issue. Aside from Freak being, well, a freak, it just doesn't feel Spidey-ish to me, if that makes sense, which it probably doesn't. Aside from that, I think I'm getting sick of seeing random villains that are created for this, and want to see him fight Doc Ock or a Goblin (not Menace) or Vulture or something and not random people that we don't really care about all that much considering they are in 3 issues and are gone. Freak is just weird. I don't know. Not interesting, just weird. I used to enjoy the issues despite hating and despising the reason behind them. This though is just bad in my opinion. I just don't like this issue. There isn't enough Spidey doing stuff. Some things are kind of cute, but not worth the Amazing Spider-Man title. Sigh...

Mighty Avengers 10


Basic Plot: Doom, Iron Man and Sentry try and go back to the future.

Yes, I know I just referenced a movie in the plot, but feh. Oh, and you may be wondering why the heck Sentry is fighting Thing on the cover. What, is that a robot made by Doom? No, it is the Thing and they do fight in the issue. Sentry kicks his ass of course, but they do fight. All in all, it was kind of cute and parts are more for people who read Sentry's arc in New Avengers, in fact, parts might not make sense if you haven't read that, but it is pretty good all in all. I like the story and find it fun. I really am going to miss Bagley when he goes to the dreaded competition (should I have capitalized that?), but seeing his work here is nice. Plus, I just love how the Sentry just freaks out, and for good reason. So, they went into a comic from the past, correct? Well, they went into one of the issues of The Sentry, and one that they showed parts of in New Avengers during that arc, so it is all fun and awesome. And it is cool to see Iron Man freaking out because he thinks Doom might be a Skrull. For what its worth, I don't think Doom is a Skrull. Of the Mighty Avengers, I would say Carol Danvers or Wonder Man being a Skrull. Of the New Avengers, Luke Cage, mostly because he is the one raising the most hell about it, so you wouldn't suspect him. I don't suspect Iron Man for many reasons. One: They would give him an out, just like they did in WWH, and I don't want that, nor think they would do that again on this scale. Two: He honestly seems surprised in his thoughts in this issue. Three: That is the one that makes most sense, so I don't think they'll do it. Iron Man is one of the most powerful individuals in the world in multiple ways, so it would make sense for them to target him, but I don't think that he is. Sure, it is not any proof, but it is my opinion. Deal with it.

Avengers: The Initiative 10


Basic Plot: KIA keeps trying to kill people. Other people try and find a way to stop it.

Well, the cover of the actual comic has the words "One will die!" on the front, and looking at that cover, one of those people dies in this issue. Sure, Trauma died last issue, but whatever. One of the people on the cover dies in this issue. KIA is freakin' crazy and it is awesome to see him try and deal with logic, as his logic is so different from everybody else. I've liked Slapstick ever since I picked up the 4th issue of his mini-series from a 3 for a $1 box, and this issue definitely has some Slapstick in it. Trying to look from something in his pocket, he pulls everything else out, including: a rubber chicken, arrow through the head gag, something to do with pineapples ("That's weird, I don't even like pineapples...), a Spongebob plush, a frog, a Spider-Man plush, another chicken, some TNT, a hammer, a bowling ball, some pins, a dinosaur toy, a chainsaw, a sword, a battle axe, a trumpet and lots of other things. Having infinite pockets comes in handy. Taskmaster and Ant-Man are in it for less than half a page, but it is memorable. As opposed to going to help fight KIA, they decided to watch some episodes of Chuck on Ant-Man's iPod. Seriously. Slott, you are a genius. So, Mutant Zero makes an appearance again, and I checked out the Wikipedia page on Mutant Zero and basically, you know nothing of Mutant Zero other than that she is a mutant, and apparently a well known mutant. My guess? Jean Grey. What other female mutant that is well known, especially to non-comic readers is not up to something in something else. The main ones I think of would be Rogue, Storm and Jean Grey. Rogue is up to stuff in X-Men, Storm was doing stuff with Black Panther, but apparently is back with the X-Men, Jean Grey is dead. Wait, Jean is dead? Then how? Well, Jean is the freakin' Phoenix, so she won't be dead forever. Plus, Mutant Zero was shown to be able to take out a whole bunch of Warbound Death's Heads and is able to cloak Gyrich from KIA, who can apparently sense people on his list, while Gyrich is a few feet away from him. Fun issue, and I enjoyed it.

Fantastic Four 555


Basic Plot: Alyssa tries to sell Reed on the idea of Nu-World, while not much else happens.

Okay, so is anyone else amused by the FF having issue 555. I mean, it is FFour with 555. No one? Bueller? Anyway...I don't know how Millar and Hitch do it, but they can make the boring interesting. I mean, pretty much, Reed walked around looking at what people are doing with Nu-Earth, Human Torch starts making out with a hot supervillain (random new villainess) and there are some flashbacks and random other 1-page stuff, but that is it. And I somehow really liek it. I put high expectations on Millar and Hitch because of Ultimates 2 and Ultimates, and with nothing happening, I am satisfied. I have hated issues where more happened, but this is just impressive for me. Eh, I just love Hitch and Millar working on something and being more skeptical does nothing. Not much else to say.

Nova 11


Basic Plot: Nova tries to convince Warlock to help him.

Okay, so things are going to get confusing, so bear with me. Adam Warlock is the "perfect" man that was created by Earth scientists and he had superpowers and has had many different forms with varying degrees of omnipotence. He once wielded the Infinity Gauntlet, but dispersed the gems and made the Infinity Watch. Presently, he is with the High Evolutionary, with whom he has interacted with many times before. He has an evil side that has taken over the universe in some parallel dimensions, called the Magus, which is basically a purple evil version of Warlock. The Magus is featured on the Infinity Gauntlet card in VS, having worn it in the Infinity War series (a follow up to Infinity Gauntlet). Now, in the New Mutants, there was a being named Warlock who was a Techno-organic being who wanted to learn about Earth, and was taken in by Xavier and the NM. He became good friends with Doug Ramsey, aka Cypher, and he can shapeshift, like all members of his species. Warlock's father was named Magus and attempted to kill his son on multiple occasions and was defeated by the X-Men or New Mutants. So, there is Adam Warlock (AW), and his evil alter-ego, the Magus (AWMagus) and Warlock (W) and his father, the Magus (WMagus). For the sake of these reviews, Warlock is W and Adam Warlock is AW.
So when Nova lands on Kvch, looking for help with the Techno-organic virus, he runs into W, who helps him out, although not as much as he could. All in all, it feels like filler while Annihilation: Conquest is the main story. It is fun, but it feels like they are stalling until Nova can come back and save the day or something. Still, it is fun to see W and see Technarch culture and how they are going to be screwed as Gamora and Drax summoned a siredam, a fully mature Technarch. What now? More fun, hopefully. Although hopefully, they'll do something soon.

Annihilation: Conquest 5


Basic Plot: Why does Ultron want the Kree Empire? What is the point? All these questions are answered better in this issue.

Well, if Nova wants to save the day, he has to hurry up, just one issue left in the series. Basically, Ultron was somehow able to, through sheer force of will, take over the Phalanx, who had recently picked up his sentience from one of their Babel Spires. He only wanted the Kree so that he could get the High Evolutionary so he could get Adam Warlock's body, and lots of them, and then he would destroy Earth with an army of Adam Warlocks. Well, it doesn't look good on the Ultron front. On the other hand, Starlord's crew was able to pick up an impressive victory and they are pretty much destroying the main Babel Spire on Hala. Oh, and Ronan succeeded too and has taken the Sentries and is about to destroy Hala. Apparently 15000 Sentries can destroy the world in about 10 minutes. Holy crap! All in all, I am starting to grow into Tom Raney's art being inked and/or colored this way, although it took me 5 issues. I do like the story although it isn't nearly the great work that Annihilation was, it still is good.